do certain songs make you think of specific memories? when you hear a song you haven’t heard in a while, does it make you feel a certain way? that’s how it works for me. “motown philly” screams 5th grade. when i think of first umc lawrenceville, i remember heather singing and dancing to “jehovah jireh” at campmeeting. “run around” by blues traveler reminds me of the summer after 8th grade, which i was particularly fond of. mo thugs and usher remind me of late high school. (yes, morgan, straight up gangstas.) and for some reason, “your grace is enough” reminds me of snellville umc. sometimes i miss that place.

it’s not that i miss the place so much as miss that stage of my life. my favorite times were in the old chapel — night time worship with the doors open, fall breezes fluttering in with a slight chill, hundreds of flickering candles reflecting off the stained glass, the piano, the stillness, the old wooden pews, the noise the floor made when dozens of youth were jumping up and down worshipping their faces off, the lovely mustiness, a sense of spiritual freedom, the friendships i made in that phase of my life….for whatever reason, it was a time i felt really close to God. i was seeking and learning, reflecting and listening, serving and loving it…. i know times change and people move on. and i love my life now. i just want that sense of aliveness and focus back.

determined and thirsty, i’m seeking.
and i cannot wait for the newness that comes with fall.